if tomorrow never comes

recently i realised i am not the only stressed one.

sounds rather dumb because we all know everyone's stressed.
i know that as well, but i don't pay much attention to everyone else.
so this realisation kinda came upon me quite late.

i guess i've been so caught up with my own load of work,
that i've failed to notice or show concern for my friends who are struggling to keep afloat as well.

and this brought me to reflection.

what do i really want to achieve by convocation 2012?
do i want to be flooded with memories of my sufferings, my achievements, my sense of self-worth.. me myself and i?
how about forming meaningful relationships?
how about leaving an impact, though small, in someone's life?
how about shifting the attention away from myself for awhile and spending time with someone who may be wilting inside?

what if i die tomorrow?
do i want to leave with regrets for working too much, but loving too little? do i want to leave with regrets for not spending enough time with the people i truly care about? do i want to leave with regrets for not spending enough time with God?

i've been trying to ask people out for lunch these days.
some might think i'm too free.
some people hesitate and don't give me a definite answer.

of course i can totally understand and empathise.

but for me, i don't want this phase of my life to pass just like that.

if you know what i mean.

okay it's 3:46am.
and i haven't blogged so much in a long while already.

resolution: try to be less selfish. it won't be easy, but try.